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Monday, October 26, 2009

What Tastes Good

I love to bake.
It is one of my favorite things in the world to do.
I love everything about it.
The creative process of making something that melts  on your tongue and brings a smile to your face the moment it touches your taste buds.
I love that I can make those around me feel loved just by giving them something yummy and well presented.
Who doesn't love cupcakes? Or homemade chocolate chip cookies with macadamia nuts and white chocolate drizzled on top? And brownies..... toffee covered and topped with fudge?
And don't get me started on pastries....... that is the stuff of my dreams. 

So...... when I found out that I was allergic to wheat and yeast I thought, with my cup is half full mentality, "No problem. I will just improvise."
I had no idea how hard it would be.
I am not a huge bread eater but I do love the occasional biscuit or my favorite..... buttery croissants with even more butter dripping off of them.
But I thought to myself, "You can do this. You can make this work."
Needless to say once the cold hard reality hit, I was sad..... depressed even.

It wasn't fair. 
Jesus got to eat bread right?
Why couldn't I?
And what about making all those people happy?
Although, I still bake for others on occasion, the joy was taken away from me in that I couldn't partake and share in that joy.

It was a huge bummer.
I tease with my family that I feel like a special needs person.
I guess I am.
And the few things I am learning has sparked a mind journey that I am still embarking on.

When you do change and improvise in anything you do, baking... life...... things are going to be different then when you did it otherwise before.
Things will look different, feel different, and in my case taste different.
At first you may not like the results.
You may turn your nose away and feel sorry for yourself.
You may even declare as I have, many a time, that "It's just not fair!"
And it's not.
But sometimes, and usually........ it is for our better good.

Change can be fun. 
But not fun change is....... well..... not fun.
It is uncomfortable and oft times uneasy.
It can be mind boggling and life altering.
It can bring about the best in you, or the very worst.
I have had some of these, and probably most in my own reactions.

But I do know this..... that when I stopped partaking and taking in what wasn't good for me, and what my body had been so tirelessly trying to tell me..... I began to feel better.
No more stomach aches and brain splitting headaches.
No more random pains and unexplained happenings in random areas of my body system.
I just felt good.
And what once was so good to me before, didn't taste so good to me now.
Because I knew the consequences of eating it.
And I was so mad that I did.

I wanted it to be something else.
I was assured that after so long of not eating that way that I might be able to go back.
Unfortunately for me.... now that I have purged my body from what it didn't want there in the first place, it now recognizes it the moment I put it back in.
And the result is immediate.
My body kicks in its defenses and attacks what it now views as foreign.

This is so much like all the other things in our lives that don't belong there.
We want them, therefore we continue to partake of them. And in the process we continue to be sick with our messed up mentalities, and junked up thought processes.
We even get mad when well meaning people try to help us in our state of sickness.
We get defensive. And we shout, "It's not fair!"
We don't like being told that we can't do something that we enjoy....  has become our way of doing things.... or our way of dealing with what we can't control.
Worse yet...... that which has become comfortable to us. 
What we like, and what tastes good.
Even when it is making us sick.
When we secretly know deep down that something is not right.
That something is very wrong.

It is not easy to change your thinking.
We all want things the way we want them.

Our comfort and security.... no matter how false that really is.
Our  timing.
Our  prejudices.
Our choices.
Our  way.

Sounds ugly when you say it like that.
And it is..... ugly.
Always wanting and demanding our way always is.
We just delude ourselves into thinking that we justly deserve this.
That we are owed it and therefore it is our right to demand it.

But it's not.
It is ultimately not what is best for us.
Or in our best interest.
And that is where the rub is.
The uncomfortable knowledge that what we are doing and how we are going about it is not right.
And we know it. And it makes us mad.
We strike out and fight.
We can unmeaningly hurt those we love and even those around us who we know love us very much.
In that moment though...... we don't care.
We are so upset that we know that we have to change.
To change our thinking, our living , and our way of doing things.

In the end we ultimately choose.
To keep being miserable and taking one more bite after the other.
Knowing the consequences.....
Or we choose to change.
Letting God come in and surrendering all that we know is holding us back.

It will look different.
Feel different.
And ultimately taste different.

But it's okay.....
If we let it be.
And if we want to be whole and healed in the way that our bodies and minds so desperately need.

And hey, if your like me..... trying really hard to see the cup half full......
Once you've gotten over the Poor Me syndrome ......
You will begin to discover that there ARE other ways of doing things.
If your willing to open yourself up to the possibility of something new.... and the somethings that can re-open the once closed off parts of your life.
You may discover that what you once thought impossible..... now has possibility.

Like the yummy muffin I ate this morning.
Totally good for me, and totally free from the "stuff" that is not right for me.

There is something to be said for that.

It just tasted good.

..... until another tomorrow.


"Taste and see that the Lord is good.
      Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in him!
  Fear the Lord, you his godly people,
      for those who fear him will have all they need.
  Even strong young lions sometimes go hungry,
      but those who trust in the Lord will lack no good thing." Psalm 34:8-10


  1. This reminds me of the Bible study I have been doing this week. The Israelites remembered the leeks and onions of Egypt in the midst of eating manna, but forgot the horrors of often I am just like that too! The "No fun change" that is good for me and how quickly I forget the blessing the LORD is holding out if I will just trust that the change He brings is good. Thanks Melissa! Keep writing it stirs my heart to remember Life is Worth Living, His Way! love you!

  2. Oh boy, could I relate! I've had to make the exact changes and more for our household, and it IS a tough transition. Even when our body has made and thanks us for it, we still wish we could partake in the usual less-than-healthy fare.

    I pray it gets easier for you... and that perhaps you could share any recipes you stumble upon! ;-)