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Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Fences and Dancing

We love to dance. 
My family that is. We often brake out into random dancing while the I-pod is blaring a favorite song, and it is usually while doing the dinner dishes. 
I'm not sure why exactly. I think it was my youngest daughter who started it all. Not the dancing, but the music. And the dancing just came along with it. 
It's not formal or rehearsed. It is free and fun. Joyful.
Last night was such a night. My oldest daughter ran to get the music as I began lathering up the sponge with soap. My son was at the table finishing up homework, my youngest was texting a friend, and my husband was lovingly preparing my birthday dinner for the next day.
We like it loud. Well.... the kids and I do. My husband merely tolerates us and "pretends" to not take notice. 
But I can't miss the look on his face. The smile as he's working while my oldest daughter and I bump hips and giggle while turning and singing along with one of our favorite songs. And when our son gets up and starts to belt out the lyrics and brake out in some of his favorite hip hop moves, I even catch him bouncing along and grinning from ear to ear. 
It isn't really about the dancing or the music, although I have raised my kids to love both.
It is about the love. The acceptance. And the overwhelming feeling of security that comes from being together. Doing something crazy and carefree and not caring about what anyone else might think.
We have fought hard for this. My husband and I. We still are. It isn't easily gained and not merely earned.
It is something we have had to get dirty for. Beaten up over. And taken risks that we otherwise might shy away from if we hadn't already counted the cost. And knew the reward.
We are far from perfect and full of our own frailties. 
But we are loved. And because of that love we have chosen the path we are walking and at times have had to crawl on.
We have set boundaries and broken them. Cut down fences and re-built them.
We have been beaten and bruised. Torn and then mended. Dry and then replenished.
We know our source. We are learning more and more who our Shepherd is.
We have learned what it's like to go outside His protective covering and felt the pain of our own choosing.
We have also been brought back. Carried in the circle of His arms. Ashamed and convicted by our knowing that we have disappointed Him. 
And oddly, we have found joy in His discipline. And although we don't like it we've always known that it is for our good.
As we danced around the kitchen tonight I could almost feel the covering. I know it is because we have chosen to be there. And as the feeling washes over me I am overcome with the sense that our Heavenly Father is enjoying this moment with me.
He knows. He sees. He has been here from the start. He has felt and gone deep with me over the last few years of my life. With all of us.
And the thought makes me smile. 
I have a feeling He's smiling too.
He is awesome. All powerful. Revered, and even rightly feared.
And He is worthy of our praise. Our song and our dancing.
Even in the kitchen. Surrounded by our invisible fences and feeling His restoration at work.
I am thankful. Grateful. I know that not every day is a dancing day, but I am going to rejoice in the ones that are.

I hope you dance.

....until another tomorrow.


"The law of the Lord is perfect, restoring the soul; the testimony of the Lord is sure, rejoicing the heart; The commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes. The fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever; The judgments of the Lord are true; they are righteous altogether. They are more desirable than gold, yes, than much fine gold; Sweeter also than honey and the drippings of the honeycomb. Moreover, by them Your servant is warned; In keeping them there is great reward. Who can discern his errors? Acquit me of hidden faults. Also keep back Your servant from presumptuous sins; Let them not rule over me; Then I will be blameless, And I shall be acquitted of great transgression. Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my rock and my Redeemer."  Psalm 19:7-14

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